I think before we try to reorient ourselves, it behooves us to get a better grip on the actual real landscape of the twenty-first century that we all have to navigate. And in fact here we need to recognize the limits of metaphors and recognize when linguistic precision is so dang necessary. As we approach the end of this little what-have-you, I’ve prepared a couple of digressions special for you. (Sorry, but at least I think I’m funny though) But seriously just a couple more thoughts to put out there – and just to reiterate the whole theme here, I’ll make it one lament and one call to pack. And as the riff demands, first the lament:

 So, it’s pretty clear by now that the term “climate change” has met the same fate as “global warming” – where, yeah, it does describe one of the major processes that we are at just the very beginning of, but it does so in a way that leaves a lot to the imagination. Literally and too damn much honestly. Because just like it became easy for enough people to imagine global warming to mean “just like now but warmer… and hey wouldn’t that actually be great come winter lol?” Likewise we’re now at the point where “yeah but climates are always in a process of change, this is just a bit faster but we’ll just build more solar panels and more a/c units or whatever technofix comes along. This is how the death cultists win btw. Are winning. Did win gdi.

           Even if your big takeaway from your time with me is that I’m just some dumb asshole with a comically inflated sense of his own analytic capabilities, which is fine (hurts a little, but fine nonetheless), at least take to heart this one thing, which I cannot emphasize even close to enough: humans are not supposed to experience geologic time. This is bad. Experiencing a few millennia’s worth of change over just a few decades or even centuries is so catastrophically bad that the primary concern of every living human being should be how to make sure it doesn’t happen. This really is the mildest possible way to put it. This is what the Big Picture is telling us in huge, bright, easy to understand, completely unmistakable letters:

UNFUCK THE PLANET YESTERDAY!

It’s not even that subtle tbqh.

           So, the need for a term that properly conveys our level of fuctitude. Like “global warming” and “climate change” it should be both simple and accurate, but obviously needs to be far more unambiguous about the true nature of the processes that are very much underway. I propose “planet death”. It’s as straightforward as you can get imho.

*Mr. Yeahbut*: “Yeah but the planet isn’t gonna die. Even if people all die off, life will go on.”

*me*: “wow, what a fuckin consolation. Jfc.”

           Seriously though: before this kind of thinking takes root in you I want you to consider a little scenario: there’s this fine fellow that you know well enough that you could tell him fairly easily from an imposter. Let’s call him McNat. McNat loved to go hiking and one day this fine fellow never came back from an excursion in the wilderness. A wee bit later you were out hiking and came across his corpse. You notice that it is teeming with life: microbial, fungal, plants, insects, worms, etc, etc, etc. My dude is a regular ecosystem in himself. Anyway, would you consider all that life that is slowly replacing his flesh with theirs as McNat himself? Would you mistake this assemblage of Life for our luckless fellow? No. And why not? One simple reason – it’s a stupid fucking question. No one would take it seriously even for a second.

           See what I’m sayin, yeah? Sure, Life will go on, but the world as we know it? All the parts of Life that you love personally? Do you see the urgency? Do you see how accurate, simple, and straightforward the term “planet death” is? (and for those who are thinking along the lines of “planet death sounds bad ass, or metal as fuck, or some such” – no. no it fucking does not. Wolves are fucking badass. Snow Leopards are metal as all fuck. These guys dying off so that some rich assholes don’t have to give up their gigantic yachts and private jets? Not badass. Not metal. Fucking depressing beyond the human limits of depression. So, no, not fucking metal at all.)